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mouthed (/mʌʊθd/) adj. A drinker who forms the words correctly but sends them out in the wrong direction. Veloria mouthed an apology towards the umbrella stand and continued upstairs. mouthednessed adj. A drinker who has developed a conspicuous oral character, principally through commentary and poor restraint. Vinayak became mouthednessed and supplied unsolicited annotations to every dish. mouthered adj. A drinker so far gone that every utterance is performed with the lips, though none is reliably completed. Itzhak was mouthered, silently forming a toast which never reached audible language. mouthfeelled adj. The condition of a drinker who has mistaken oral sensation for a branch of serious phenomenology. mouthfucked adj. The drunkenness of one who has converted the mouth into an arena of conspicuous and ill-advised exertion. Mitchel became mouthfucked and treated the karaoke microphone as an adversarial instrument. mouthfuckered adj. Reduced by drink to a practitioner of vigorous oral enterprise, with no evident appointment. Hessie was mouthfuckered and attempted to demonstrate technique using a bar spoon. mouthful of marblesed adj. Sharpened by drink into speech of such muffled abundance that articulation resembles loose objects in the mouth. Ishraq became mouthful of marblesed and rendered the address in several incompatible versions. mouthfulled adj. Still drunk, and treating each brief utterance as a complete constitutional argument. Elloise became mouthfulled and settled the dispute by presenting one decisive olive. mouthgasmed adj. Emboldened by drink to treat a pleasant mouthful as an occasion of personal transcendence. Keefer grew mouthgasmed over the gravy and invited strangers to share the discovery. mouthguarded adj. Drunk and speaking as though fitted with protective equipment, whether or not any is present. Baillee grew mouthguarded and delivered the address with admirable dental caution. mouthhooked adj. Having drunk more than was prudent, and fastening on to the nearest conversation with small hooked remarks. mouthied adj. Drunk to the point where the mouth has become a small, childish department of the personality. Jemelle became mouthied and asked whether the pudding had been made specially for him. mouthinessed adj. Drunk enough to acquire the professional confidence of someone whose mouth has outrun his evidence. Carys became mouthinessed and corrected the landlord on matters of local history. mouthinged adj. Drunk past the point of speech, yet still forming authoritative shapes with the mouth for the benefit of observers. Alyissa was mouthinged, forming authoritative shapes at the bar while her companions supplied increasingly charitable interpretations. mouthless crabbed adj. Drunk beyond the ordinary facilities of speech, advancing sideways through the evening with a crustacean’s dignity. Mache became mouthless crabbed and approached the buffet by a deliberate lateral route. mouthlessnessed adj. Drunk in a way that removes the mouth from proceedings, leaving only gestures and administrative intent.