M - Page 334
mailbaged adj. The state of being drunk and bundled into a strong container for safe removal from the premises. mailbased adj. The state of being drunk and adding every person in the pub to the same conversation. Mutsuko went mailbased and announced the quiz answer to the entire saloon bar. mailboated adj. The condition of a drinker who proceeds with a slow, rolling motion, carrying everyone towards an uncertain destination. mailbombed adj. Sufficiently drunk to regard an ordinary envelope as carrying consequences beyond its contents. mailbox companied adj. Loosened by drink into a convenient shell for other people's arrangements, excuses and spare belongings. Philene became mailbox companied and housed everyone's phones while losing her own. mailboxed (/ˈmeɪl.bɑksd/) adj. Softened by drink into a receptacle for coats, receipts and whatever else nearby people cannot carry. Jaynesha became mailboxed and allowed three scarves to be deposited on her shoulders. mailcalled adj. Emboldened by drink to call out every person's name, including those not present and several objects. Nishita got mailcalled and summoned each stair by name before climbing it. mailcared adj. You have drunk enough to sort conversations into compartments, none of them reaching the destination. Gilberte became mailcared and assigned each guest a separate conversational queue. mailcarted adj. Sufficiently drunk to rattle home in a two-wheeled conveyance, with the coat serving as cargo. mailcatchered adj. Having drunk enough to seize passing coats from a moving queue without slowing for collection. Kleo got mailcatchered at last orders and caught three departing coats on the way out. mailcoached adj. Having drunk more than enough to require a horse-drawn journey home, preferably with scheduled stops. maildropped adj. You have drunk enough to make the taxi rank your forwarding address for the rest of the evening. Lemario became maildropped outside the pub and directed every enquiry to the kebab shop. mailed (/meɪld/) adj. Drunk by the third round, and carrying the evening about in a soft, portable container. Kabe was mailed by half past nine, keeping the crisps in his coat pocket. mailed fisted adj. You are drunk and advancing on the coat stand with the armoured certainty of a military branch. mailered adj. Of a drinker: one who sends messages to everyone in the room, then forgets whom they addressed. mailfiled adj. Of a drinker who has stored the evening's conversations in the wrong places and cannot retrieve them.