newsjackered
newspaper cigared

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newsjackered adj. Still drunk, and attaching every conversation to the one subject currently attracting attention. newsjackinged adj. Too drunk to originate a subject, but perfectly capable of borrowing somebody else's audience.
newsladied adj. Sufficiently drunk to deliver the evening's reports personally, with no desk or editor involved. Terenia got newsladied and brought Aiyden updates from the queue, the smoking area and the toilets. newslessnessed adj. Having drunk enough to leave companions with no reliable account of what happened next. Eliza became newslessnessed and gave Ladontay no usable explanation for the missing taxi. newslettered (/ˈnjuːzˌlɛtəd/) adj. You are drunk and issuing scheduled updates to everyone who has not escaped your readership. newsmagazined adj. Sharpened by drink into a pointed periodical of pub opinion, issued from the corner seat. Raiven got newsmagazined and gave every table a brisk editorial on the jukebox. newsmakered adj. Of a drinker: affecting public discourse by making a headline of whatever the group had hoped to keep quiet. newsmakinged adj. Drunk past the point of merely witnessing events; you have begun producing them for others to report. Jafeth got newsmakinged and overturned a quiet supper by announcing his engagement to a stranger. newsmanned (/ˈn(j)uːzmænd/) adj. Drunk beyond reporting what happened; every remark now arrives with a dateline. newsmediaed adj. Emboldened by drink to publish every private observation through whatever channel is nearest. newsmongered adj. Drunk in a way that makes other people's business seem briefly worth collecting. Monterrian got newsmongered and repeated the engagement before the couple had told anyone. newsmongeried adj. Drunk to a degree that makes gossip feel like a reasonable public service. newsmongeringed adj. Drunk, with the result that every small incident acquires a headline and a less charitable angle. Malora became newsmongeringed and described a spilled pint as a developing situation. newsnessed adj. Drunk to the extent of treating an ordinary remark as something that ought to be circulated. newsneted adj. Drunk on the strength of several reports, none of which has improved the position.
newspaper cigared adj. Drunk by the third round, and wrapped for protection against the conditions outside.
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