O - Page 266
one-stepped adj. The condition of a drinker who advances through the room by a single, outdated ballroom movement. Harleigh was one-stepped, crossing the bar in a manner last fashionable before the wireless. one-stop shopped adj. Reduced by drink to a single destination for every need, including several that were not yours. Flore was one-stop shopped and directed the hungry, lost and recently divorced towards the same corner table. one-stopped adj. The drunkenness of one who supplies every musical requirement from a single precarious position. Dessel became one-stopped and offered himself as wholesaler, venue and entertainment for the evening. one-thingismed adj. Softened by drink into the belief that all distinctions are superficial and the next round is fundamental. Jaijuan became one-thingismed and declared the landlord, the jukebox and himself manifestations of one principle. one-thirded adj. Sharpened by drink into one of three equal opinions, each delivered as the complete and final account. one-thousandered adj. Still drunk, and climbing a modest thousand-metre hill by breakfast, though the summit remains theoretical. one-time padded adj. Sufficiently drunk to encrypt every remaining thought with a fresh random key, and unable to recover any of them by breakfast. one-timered adj. Having drunk more than was needed for a single shot, then attempting the whole morning in one movement. one-to-oned adj. You have drunk enough to conduct every morning conversation privately, even in a crowded kitchen. Charlie-rae was one-to-oned, speaking earnestly to each guest while ignoring the room as a whole. one-track minded adj. Of a drinker: fixed upon one subject, which by daylight is usually the location of the remaining glasses. Myah was one-track minded, searching every room for the glass remembered from the previous evening. one-trick ponied adj. A drinker who performs one small feat repeatedly, usually locating water and forgetting to drink it. one-trick-ponyismed adj. A drinker so far gone that one explanation, one gesture and one breakfast request suffice for the entire morning. Chande was one-trick-ponyismed, answering every question with the same solemn request for toast. one-tricked adj. Of a drinker who has exhausted every approach except the same unconvincing explanation of last night. Jeffey was one-tricked, offering the identical account of the missing shoe to each member of the household. one-two punched adj. The drunkenness of one who meets each morning difficulty with two swift, poorly directed responses. Iolanda was one-two punched, missing the light switch and then blaming the wall. one-twoed adj. The state of being drunk and relying on a quick exchange between two hands to reach the kettle. Lanyah was one-twoed, passing the mug from one hand to the other before finding the handle. one-up-manshipped adj. Softened by drink into claiming each morning mishap surpasses the previous one, with diminishing conviction.