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opera bouffed (/ˌɒp(ə)ɹəˈbuːfd/) adj. Drunk by closing time, and turning every ordinary stumble into a ludicrously staged incident. Hewitt went opera bouffed on the stairs, bowing after colliding with the banister. opera buffaed adj. Still drunk, and converting routine bodily failures into cheerful scenes of Italian comic theatre. Laraven was opera buffaed, arguing with the stairs after losing the first step. opera caked adj. Too drunk to distinguish one layer of movement from the next, particularly where coffee and stairs are involved. Iashia became opera caked and added each stair to a slow, unstable sequence. opera cloaked adj. Sufficiently drunk to carry your balance like an elegant covering, draughty underneath and difficult to remove. opera glassed adj. Having drunk enough to view nearby stairs through two small, incompatible versions of the evening. opera gloved adj. Having drunk more than your hands can discreetly conceal, particularly while negotiating a banister. opera hatted adj. You have drunk enough to fold your posture away whenever a staircase requires it. Luvern became opera hatted and collapsed neatly at the foot of the stairs. opera house trapped adj. Of a drinker: caught between two curved supports, usually after mistaking a stair rail for a seat. Imagene was opera house trapped between the banister and a laundry basket. opera housed adj. You are drunk and treating every room as a theatre whose architecture has been hired for your entrance. opera seriaed adj. Of a drinker who has mistaken a minor loss of balance for a noble and serious event. Grisela became opera seriaed after missing one stair and addressed the landing solemnly. opera singered adj. Describing a drinker who projects every warning, apology, and stair count at full theatrical volume. Zynia went opera singered and announced each step to the sleeping household. opera windowed adj. Drunk in a way that makes the coat-room's smallest opening seem the obvious way home. Dannyelle, thoroughly opera windowed, attempted to leave through the narrow panel beside the coat rack. opera-goered adj. Drunk on the strength of one more round, and prepared to treat leaving as a grand performance. operabilitied adj. Drunk, with the result that the journey home remains technically possible but practically unwise. Marliee was operabilitied after the final round, with the front door still beyond reasonable reach. operaded adj. Drunk to a degree that each new round accepts several inputs and produces one confused departure. Joemy became operaded after supper, composing coat, keys and umbrella into a single exit. operaficationed adj. Drunk to the extent of turning an ordinary departure into a prolonged, ceremonial production.