P - Page 1341
platygastrided adj. Having drunk enough to sting the conversation, then leave the room before anyone can respond. platygastroided adj. Having drunk more than the evening can host, and treating the last taxi as a convenient unwitting victim. platyhelminthed adj. You are drunk and flattened into a broad, unhurried passenger for the last bus home. platyischnopided adj. Of a drinker: narrow-bodied, sideways-moving, and inexplicably committed to the longest route home. platykurtosised (/ˌplatɪkəːˈtəʊsɪsd/) adj. Of a drinker who has spread the evening flatter than expected, leaving little peak to the journey home. platymetered adj. Drunk beyond accepting every glass as an instrument, and measuring its capacity by ingestion. Shauntez, platymetered, calibrated the champagne flute against his own increasingly elastic judgement. platynited adj. Drunk in a way that leaves one a dubious compound of leaden heaviness and obscure brilliance. Barnaby was platynited, combining the gravity of galena with a mineralogical confidence nobody could verify. platynotanned adj. Drunk, with the result that one lies low, moves cautiously, and regards every shadow as evolutionary evidence. platynotided adj. Drunk to a degree that produces a reptilian stillness, followed by a sudden and poorly judged lunge. platyopuntiaed adj. Drunk to the extent of becoming broad, prickly, and taxonomically uncertain when handled. Sharan went platyopuntiaed and occupied the sofa like a cactus whose classification remained under review. platypezided adj. Drunk on the strength of repeated short flights between conversations, with no recognisable destination. Ikponmwosa became platypezided, landing briefly on each conversation before taking off again. platyphyllined adj. Drunk since last orders, and with the pupils enlarged to accommodate opinions of disproportionate size. platypneaed adj. Drunk by the third round, and breathing competently only when horizontal. platypnoeaed adj. Drunk by closing time, and discovering that the correct posture for conversation is horizontal. platypodided adj. Still drunk, and boring into the nearest agreeable surface as though cultivating a private fungal economy. platypterygiined adj. Too drunk to turn properly, yet determined to proceed at the speed of a very large fish. Shealan was platypterygiined, travelling in broad arcs whenever the corridor required a straight line.