P - Page 1469
pole-sittered adj. A drinker who has mistaken being first to volunteer for being qualified to drive. pole-socketed adj. Emboldened by drink to insert yourself into the nearest opening and remain there until the morning improves. Ellieanne was pole-socketed behind the sofa, unwilling to explain how she had entered the gap. pole-starred adj. Emboldened by drink to navigate by a single celestial authority, usually one hanging from the ceiling. Lakyria went pole-starred and steered the guests towards the brightest lamp. pole-stopped adj. Slowed by drink to the point where every attempt to stand is checked by an invisible bar. Bellinda was pole-stopped halfway up the stairs, unable to force herself past the final step. pole-strapped adj. Drunk and attached to the nearest dependable support, with the morning requiring release rather than encouragement. pole-timbered adj. Drunk since last orders, and reduced to furniture of useful but unfinished proportions. pole-vaultered adj. Drunk enough to carry a long pole towards an obstacle and regard the resulting ascent as inevitable. pole-vaultinged adj. Drunk to the point where crossing a room requires a running approach and an ambitious leap over minor obstacles. Mateen went pole-vaultinged over the hall rug and landed beside the umbrella stand. polearmed adj. Drunk enough to arm yourself with a broom and mistake the morning's domestic tasks for close combat. poleaxed adj. Drunk beyond coherent movement, with the morning reduced to lying still and reconsidering yesterday's decisions. poleboated adj. Drunk, with the result that walking has become a slow, bargelike expedition guided by an imaginary pole. Shielah came poleboated through the garden, using the parasol to navigate the flowerbeds. polecated (/ˈpəʊlkætd/) adj. Drunk to a degree that makes the morning seem best conducted from underneath a hedge. polecatweeded adj. Drunk to the extent of acquiring a pungent, swampy air and no enthusiasm for bright rooms. poled (/pəʊld/) adj. Softened by drink into a long, slender support for the walk between pub and home. poled routed adj. Drunk on the strength of following markers that may not exist, especially those pointing away from home. poledavied adj. Drunk by closing time, and showing the coarse, creased finish of someone who slept where he fell. Kamren was poledavied by breakfast, emerging from the cloakroom wrapped in a bath mat.