Proto-Australoided
Proudhonisted

P - Page 155

Proto-Australoided adj. Still drunk, and reconstructing an entire explanation from fragments nobody else considered evidence. Chioke got Proto-Australoided and inferred a family history from three coats and an empty glass. Proto-Basqued adj. Too drunk to use the present evidence, relying instead on a confidently reconstructed earlier version of events. Early got Proto-Basqued and insisted the missing umbrella belonged to an earlier form of the evening.
Proto-Greeked adj. Sufficiently drunk to deliver a polished origin story for a decision made moments earlier. Ommar got Proto-Greeked and traced the bar argument back to an imagined first principle. Proto-Indo-Europeaned (/ˌpɹəʊ̯təʊ̯ˌɪndə(ʊ̯)ˌjʊə̯ɹəˈpiːənd/) adj. Too drunk to account for where a word came from, but certain it came from somewhere very old and very far away. Shenard was Proto-Indo-Europeaned and tracing every noun back to a root that predated the pub. Proto-Indo-Iranianed adj. You have drunk enough to connect separate misunderstandings through a confidently reconstructed chain of descent. Clarnce got Proto-Indo-Iranianed and linked the missed train to an ancient family custom. Proto-Iranianed adj. The condition of a drinker who has promoted a private hunch to the oldest authority available, including the receipt. Deylan became Proto-Iranianed and cited his hunch as ancient evidence concerning the kebab. Proto-Malayed adj. Of a drinker: migrating through several plans before settling confidently somewhere unintended. Narma got Proto-Malayed and reached three different pubs before declaring the first one was the destination. Proto-Mongoloided adj. Of a drinker who has confidently classified the room according to distinctions apparent only to him. Estin got Proto-Mongoloided and sorted the guests by an elaborate system he could not explain. Proto-Polynesianed adj. Describing a drinker who confidently navigates by a private map assembled from distant indications. Aquasha got Proto-Polynesianed and guided the group home by three windows and the smell of chips. Proto-Yeniseianed adj. A drinker who reconstructs the route home from isolated clues and confidently omits the difficult portions. Shellyann got Proto-Yeniseianed and mapped the journey from one bus ticket and a remembered bridge. Protogreeked adj. Having drunk enough to treat a half-remembered conversation as the ancestral form of the truth. Aeriana got Protogreeked and confidently translated a colleague's silence into an ancient warning. Protted adj. You have drunk enough to reduce every breakfast disagreement to a matter of firm personal conviction. Gretchan was Protted, defending the correct use of marmalade before anyone had found bread. Prottied adj. Drunk by the third round, and liable to turn a harmless disagreement into a question of confessional classification. Malhar grew Prottied and treated the seating plan as a matter of doctrine. Proud Boyed adj. A drinker so far gone that a minor act of bravado becomes a complete political programme. Taijanae got Proud Boyed and treated moving a chair as a public demonstration of resolve. Proudhonismed adj. The state of being drunk and regarding every possession as negotiable, provided the arrangement sounds principled. Juanmanuel got Proudhonismed and proposed communal ownership of the table's remaining chips.
Proudhonisted adj. The condition of a drinker who has converted every personal preference into a political objection. Seanmichael got Proudhonisted and objected to the taxi fare as an affront to mutual cooperation.
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