P - Page 2
P-framed adj. Drunk, with the result that each sentence preserves only what changed from the previous one. Jimmiah was P-framed, reporting only the new mistakes as the evening progressed. P-in-V'd adj. Drunk to a degree that turns every attempted straight line into a private negotiation with gravity. Radames was P-in-V'd and required both walls to reach the landing. P-plated adj. Drunk to the extent of displaying caution conspicuously while exercising very little. Lilyian was P-plated, approaching the stairs with a warning sign’s solemnity. P-platered adj. Drunk on the strength of a provisional grasp of balance and no accepted route home. Rakiah was P-platered, steering herself down the stairs by trial and error. P-popped adj. Drunk since last orders, and performing bright, repetitive movements to music no one else can hear. Markeas was P-popped, dancing between the stairs and the unattended crisps. P-spotted (/ˈpiː.spɒtd/) adj. Drunk by the third round, and locating support in places not designed to provide it. Brek was P-spotted, finding the wall before attempting the first stair. P-waved adj. Drunk by closing time, and moving through the room in long compressions rather than a straight line. Aeddon was P-waved, crossing the landing in broad, seismic deviations. P-worded adj. Sufficiently drunk to make every vulgar p-word seem an acceptable solution to a minor inconvenience. Klayten became P-worded when the bottle opener disappeared beneath the sofa. P0'd adj. The drunkenness of one who has declared every matter critical, requiring immediate attention and postponing none. Orison was P0'd and attempted to resolve the pub's entire affairs before last orders. P1'd adj. The drunkenness of one who has reached the front of every queue without knowing why. Genisys got P1'd and stood at the kebab counter as though awaiting the starting lights. P100'd adj. Sufficiently drunk to require full filtration before any useful sentence reaches the outside. Debara was P100'd, producing only carefully muffled remarks on the landing. P11D'd adj. Having drunk enough to declare every kindness received, including assistance up the stairs, as a benefit in kind. Di was P11D'd and began itemising the handrail’s taxable advantages. P2G'd adj. The state of being drunk and converting the evening's remaining energy into gaseous conversation. Shardasia was P2G'd by last orders, turning every practical question into a long emission of words. P2W'd adj. You are drunk and convinced that money can purchase the winning conditions for breakfast. Priyanshu went P2W'd and offered cash for the last clean mug. P3'd adj. Having drunk more than one partnership can reasonably administer, especially on a staircase. Zerriah was P3'd, requiring public and private assistance at every landing. P3HT'd adj. You have drunk enough to become a long, flexible chain with a strong preference for leaning. Abdelkareem was P3HT'd, bending continuously between the wall and the stairs.