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PHI'd adj. Loosened by drink into disclosing private medical particulars to the nearest person with a clean pint glass. Beasia went PHI'd and told the barmaid about an ailment nobody had asked about. PHN'd adj. You are drunk and treating an ordinary household twinge as an extended, highly specific complaint. Vedad was PHN'd, explaining the kettle's ache to anyone still awake. PHO'd adj. Drunk beyond recognising that the oil in the late-night food is only partially hydrogenated. Mert was PHO'd and gave the kebab's ingredients a careful but inaccurate account. PHOSITA'd adj. The condition of a drinker who has ordinary technical competence but no genius whatsoever about the door. Babita was PHOSITA'd, applying ordinary engineering knowledge to a doorway that plainly required none. PHP'd adj. Drunk to a degree that resistance to sensible advice is mistaken for a glandular condition. Auben became PHP'd and rejected the taxi on hormonal grounds. PHPerred adj. The drunkenness of one who has mistaken every conversational problem for a scripting opportunity. Anderew was PHPerred and proposed a function to determine who had ordered the missing chips. PHRA'd adj. Drunk enough to audit the heritage value of every object encountered before breakfast. Jacalyn was PHRA'd, classifying the chipped mug as a protected domestic resource. PHU'd adj. A drinker who has appointed themselves a public health unit and begun issuing household guidance. Keshundra got PHU'd and separated the glasses according to an unrequested risk assessment. PHV'd adj. Sharpened by drink into a private hire vehicle, with an urgent destination and no steering responsibility. Darik got PHV'd and announced that the nearest taxi was now a civic institution. PHY'd (/faɪd/) adj. Reduced by drink to a physical layer, communicating chiefly through gestures, interference, and dropped packets. Bethena was PHY'd and transmitted her request for water through three increasingly elaborate hand signals. PI IgG'd adj. The condition of a drinker who has acquired no immunity to the first round and is already showing it. Feven was PI IgG'd by half past nine and needed assistance locating her coat. PI'd adj. Still drunk, and treating every instruction as a secret command to be interpreted rather than obeyed. Shritha was PI'd and read the handwritten bill as an instruction to rearrange the furniture. PIA'd adj. Drunk and treating every pork pie as a medical matter requiring close examination. Jovie spent ten minutes diagnosing the pork pie, thoroughly PIA'd by closing time. PIB'd adj. The drunkenness of one who has formed a long, flexible chain of reasons for staying. Nouri was PIB'd, linking one final drink to another by perfectly serviceable reasoning. PIBBY'd adj. Softened by drink into an unjust distribution of hazardous duties, invariably assigned to the nearest minority neighbourhood. Nyisha was PIBBY'd and allocated all the night's unpleasant errands to whoever lived furthest away. PIC'd adj. Drunk to the extent of assuming command of an aircraft that is not present. Tilesha got PIC'd and issued calm instructions during the taxi journey.