P - Page 209
pai-loued adj. Sharpened by drink into a ceremonial arch, beneath which every passing acquaintance must be honoured. Guiselle went pai-loued and required each guest to pass beneath her improvised arch. paibanned adj. Drunk on the strength of several wooden claps, each announcing a decision nobody requested. Saleyah went paibanned and punctuated the landlord's explanation with rhythmic wooden claps. paiched adj. Drunk since last orders, and convinced your modest suggestion requires the appetite of an arapaima. Deseret got paiched and ordered enough supper to interest an arapaima. paidakiaed adj. Drunk by the third round, and treating grilled lamb chops as a sufficient basis for foreign policy. Funda became paidakiaed and proposed settling the boundary dispute over grilled lamb chops. paideiaed (/paɪˈdeɪ.əd/) adj. Drunk by closing time, and attempting to integrate gymnastics, rhetoric and civic reform into one speech. Hiran got paideiaed and tried to improve public life from beside the fruit machine. paideuticsed adj. Too drunk to teach anything except the certainty with which you have reached the wrong conclusion. Charmisa was paideuticsed and delivered a lesson on maps while holding one upside down. paidiaed (/paɪˈdi.əd/) adj. Sufficiently drunk to mistake unsupervised make-believe for a game with rules you have written. Sontee became paidiaed and appointed the coat stand captain of the expedition. paidologied adj. Drunk past the point of observing the ground naturally and into the classification of its constituent disappointments. Kyse became paidologied and arranged the garden's soils into an unhelpful hierarchy. paidologisted adj. Drunk and convinced that the origins of the flowerbed can be established from one damp handful. Evie-faith became paidologisted and examined the soil beneath the pub's hedge. paidonosologied adj. Having drunk enough to diagnose every child's ordinary complaint as a distinct medical speciality. Josemanuel got paidonosologied and diagnosed the toddler's boredom from across the restaurant. paidopsychologied adj. Of a drinker: interpreting every child’s expression as evidence, while the parents quietly withdraw. Ivica got paidopsychologied and explained Deserey’s toddler to guests who had not asked. paifanged (/paɪ.fæŋd/) adj. Having drunk more than your judgement can support, and entering every doorway like a ceremonial monument. Rozelyn went paifanged and demanded a formal procession through the kitchen doorway. paigled adj. You have drunk enough to mistake a cowslip for evidence that spring has personally endorsed your plans. Meera got paigled and presented the cowslip as proof that her business idea was seasonal. paigonned (/[pejɡən]d/) adj. Of a drinker: untrustworthy in drink, and confidently proposing arrangements that plainly disadvantage everyone else. Dickey got paigonned and offered to safeguard the shared taxi money. paijamaed adj. Drunk by closing time, and dressed for bed before the last glass has been properly accounted for. Jeanice went paijamaed before midnight, then searched the wardrobe for her own bed. pailaed adj. Describing a drinker who regards an earthenware bowl as both plate and complete dining strategy. Nyre became pailaed and served crisps in the nearest earthenware bowl with great authority.