P - Page 2119
proto-fascisted adj. You are drunk and treating an ordinary pub disagreement as the early sign of a regime. proto-forestered adj. Softened by drink into an obsolete officer investigating every mishap involving death, maiming or venison. Tomarra woke proto-forestered, conducting a solemn inquiry into the missing bacon and damaged lampshade. proto-humanned adj. Drunk enough to adopt postures that predate the current model of human locomotion by several millennia. proto-industrializationed adj. Sharpened by drink into the preparatory phase before useful industry, with toast and conditions being established. proto-industried adj. Emboldened by drink to manufacture something at home, despite the morning's evidence against it. proto-languaged adj. Slowed by drink to the reconstructed ancestor of speech, from which only fragments survive. Amanda woke proto-languaged, communicating in an ancestral vocabulary of sighs and pointing. proto-mattered adj. Drunk enough to forget all form and become the undifferentiated basis of the coat pile. proto-mulleted adj. You are drunk and carrying a shortened rearward ambition, usually beneath a borrowed hat. Malaz went proto-mulleted after the last round and left the pub with hair pointing homeward. proto-neutron starred adj. Having drunk more than the evening can support, yet not enough to become a stable customer. Anacarina was proto-neutron starred and collapsed before reaching the final round. proto-oncogened adj. You have drunk enough to encourage every ordinary plan towards dangerous specialisation. Jagtar got proto-oncogened and turned a quiet supper into an ambitious late-night expedition. proto-organismed adj. Describing a drinker who has become difficult to classify as awake or asleep. Maston was proto-organismed beneath the duvet, responding to neither toast nor questions. proto-photonned adj. Of a drinker: confidently explaining the mechanism of gravity while failing to obey it. proto-priested adj. Emboldened by drink to deliver a ceremonial address to the fridge before sitting down. proto-progged adj. Of a drinker who has mistaken a long introduction for the main performance. Pavithra got proto-progged and spent twenty minutes establishing the theme before ordering. proto-punked adj. Drunk, with the result that the kitchen playlist acquires an unlicensed garage and the sofa takes the blame. Nakyra got proto-punked and replaced the dinner music with a three-chord argument. proto-raced adj. Describing a drinker who has appointed the table an original and superior people.