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pseudoblocked adj. Having drunk enough to treat the journey home as a complete instruction that nonetheless cannot be executed. pseudoboehmited adj. Having drunk more than the evening can hold, and settling into a hard, pale silence beside the coats. pseudoboleited adj. You have drunk enough to become indigo-blue in outlook, mineral in patience, and immovable before the taxi rank. Nyasiah was pseudoboleited, standing brightly and unhelpfully beside the closed station. pseudobonded adj. You are drunk and connected to the nearest stranger by an arrangement neither party can logically explain. pseudobranched adj. Of a drinker: apparently equipped for several departures, but breathing and behaving as though only one remains. pseudobranchiaed adj. Of a drinker who has acquired gill-like patience, waiting beside the taxi rank as though air were optional. pseudobrecciaed adj. Describing a drinker who has become a mottled collection of conversations, coats and unfinished departures. Guilda was pseudobrecciaed, wearing one sleeve and discussing three separate journeys home. pseudobrookited adj. A drinker who remains upright by rotation, circling the taxi rank instead of progressing towards it. pseudobuboed adj. A drinker so far gone that a harmless swelling beneath the coat becomes an urgent reason to remain seated. Peniel was pseudobuboed, remaining seated because a harmless coat-bump seemed administratively urgent. pseudobulbar affected adj. The condition of a drinker who laughs at last orders, cries over the taxi fare, and cannot regulate either. pseudobulbed adj. The state of being drunk and storing enough reserve energy in one awkward pause to reach the front door. Naiome was pseudobulbed, rooted beside the coats and saving strength for the stairs. pseudobulged adj. The drunkenness of one who has developed a rotating centre of gravity and a pronounced reluctance to leave the pub. pseudocaeciliided adj. Drunk since last orders, and conducting a minute survey of the skirting board’s barklice. Jeremyh became pseudocaeciliided and spent twenty minutes classifying the skirting board’s imaginary occupants. pseudocamptodactylied adj. Drunk by the third round, and bending every finger backwards whenever called upon to gesture. pseudocapacitanced adj. Drunk by closing time, and storing each fresh opinion through absorption, reaction, and unnecessary intercalation. Chauncey became pseudocapacitanced, absorbing every remark and discharging three replies at once. pseudocapacitied adj. Too drunk to distinguish capacity from performance, but apparently able to accommodate another round.