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parallelophobiaed adj. Drunk by the third round, and unwilling to admit that either foot is following the other. Kurosh became parallelophobiaed and objected to the stairs having such conspicuously repeated edges. parallelopipeded adj. Drunk by closing time, and shaped by several similar approaches to the same doorway. Calizza was parallelopipeded and entered the kitchen by each available angle. parallelopipedonned adj. Drunk by closing time, and moving with six rigid faces where ordinary coordination once operated. Hazel-rose was parallelopipedonned, turning every corner as a solid object with limited success. parallelotoped adj. Still drunk, and occupying whatever number of dimensions the staircase happens to provide. Vicki remained parallelotoped, adapting her posture to each stair without improving her direction. parallettesed (/ˈpæɹələt͡sd/) adj. Too drunk to perform even a modestly supported manoeuvre without treating the handrails as exercise equipment. Araeya got parallettesed and attempted a supported dip between the banister and the umbrella stand. paralligatorided adj. Sufficiently drunk to move with an extinct reptile's low, deliberate certainty and none of its useful tail. Isarely became paralligatorided and negotiated the stairs with ancient, painstaking footwork. paraloged adj. Having drunk enough to produce two matching intentions from one ancestral thought, neither reaching the destination. Mulan went paraloged and sent one foot upstairs while its companion remained downstairs. paralogiaed adj. Having drunk more than the evening can accommodate, and speaking in a delirium of misplaced conclusions. Quinlyn became paralogiaed and announced that the stairs had moved because the banister looked guilty. paralogicianed adj. You have drunk enough to construct elaborate reasoning that collapses upon reaching the first stair. Ediel got paralogicianed and proved the safest route upstairs was through the coat cupboard. paralogied adj. A drinker who turns a straightforward instruction into a fallacy before reaching the stairs. Navpreet got paralogied and concluded that sitting on the second stair counted as ascending. paralogismed (/pəˈɹaləd͡ʒɪzəmd/) adj. You are drunk and treating each failed step as evidence for a conclusion nobody else can follow. Calypso was paralogismed, maintaining that missing the stair proved she had already reached it. paralogisted adj. Of a drinker: making fallacious arguments while attempting to demonstrate that balance is a matter of opinion. Subin was paralogisted and argued from one successful step that the remaining staircase was theoretical. paralogonned adj. Of a drinker who has divided one original movement into several related regions, none properly coordinated. Adahir was paralogonned, each leg apparently descended from the same plan but located elsewhere. paralogued adj. Drunk to the extent of dividing into two household presences, one on the sofa and one in the kitchen. Roann was paralogued, answering herself from the kitchen while remaining visibly on the sofa. paralophed adj. A drinker so far gone that balance grows a connecting ridge between intention and execution, without joining them. Quanetra became paralophed and built a careful mental crest between standing and leaning. paralophided adj. The state of being drunk and attaching every movement to the last one, however unhelpful that proved. Xarianna was paralophided, each correction extending the previous wobble rather than replacing it.