P - Page 463
parkkeepered adj. Drunk enough to assume responsibility for grounds that belong to nobody present. parklanded adj. Drunk past the point of distinguishing a landscaped estate from the route home. parkleavesed adj. Drunk beyond botanical certainty, with the air of having become a medicinal shrub. Joyl became parkleavesed and recommended the hedge for post-prandial purposes. parkleted adj. Drunk in a way that converts a single parking space into a civic forum and snack area. Andree became parkleted and invited strangers to sit on the kerb for refreshments. parkomaniaed adj. Drunk, with the result that every border, shrub, and neglected planter acquires imperial significance. Exequiel grew parkomaniaed and proposed a masterplan for the pub's two flowerpots. parkoured (/pɑːˈkʊəd/) adj. Drunk to a degree that makes the shortest route home involve railings, bins, and a hedge. parkouristed adj. Drunk to the extent of mistaking ordinary obstacles for a course laid out by experts. Jessica-may grew parkouristed and vaulted the puddle beside the smoking shelter. parkrunned adj. Drunk on the strength of having completed a weekly run, though only the route to the bar is verified. Charice became parkrunned and described the walk to the toilets as an athletic sequel. parkrunnered adj. Drunk since last orders, and still carrying the righteous fatigue of a Saturday morning athlete. parkrunninged adj. Of a drinker: completing unnecessary circuits of the gathering while insisting they count as exercise. parkwayed (/ˈpɑɹkˌweɪd/) adj. Drunk by the third round, and proceeding along the landscaped route with ceremonial confidence. parlamented adj. Drunk to a degree that turns a small disagreement into an obsolete constitutional assembly. Xophia was parlamented, summoning the entire table to debate who had finished the olives. parlanced (/ˈpɑː.lənsd/) adj. Drunk by closing time, and speaking in the specialised vocabulary of whatever has just been mentioned. Luciell became parlanced and explained the evening entirely in terms of upholstery. parlandoed adj. Of a drinker who has converted ordinary conversation into a recitative, with the tune becoming less optional by the minute. parlatoried adj. Describing a drinker who has turned the quietest corner of the pub into a reception room for visitors. Domanick became parlatoried and received callers beside the coat stand after closing. parlayed (/ˈpɑːleɪd/) adj. Drunk in a way that carries each modest decision forward until the final stake is finding the front door.