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patchreed adj. Drunk past the point of recognising seasoned aubergine as food rather than a personal challenge. Jenaveve got patchreed and attempted to negotiate with the fried aubergine. patchried adj. Drunk beyond the point where fried aubergine seems an adequate foundation for major policy. Elladean got patchried and proposed settling the parking dispute over seasoned aubergine. patchseted adj. Drunk in a way that applies one confident correction after another until nothing works as before. Amrutha got patchseted and updated the pub's till with instructions from a biscuit packet. patchuked adj. Still drunk, and possessed of the aromatic persistence of roots that have outlasted their original purpose. Kellyjo was patchuked the following afternoon, faintly fragrant and unwilling to discuss the preceding evening. patchworded adj. Drunk, with the result that a convenient word is inserted wherever the metre of the evening falters. Analyssa got patchworded and added 'darling' to every sentence to preserve the rhythm. patchwork plagiarismed adj. A drinker so far gone that every explanation is copied from several previous excuses, with minor changes. Rodrecus gave a patchwork plagiarismed account of the missing crisps, borrowing details from everyone present. patchwork quilted adj. The state of being drunk and assembled from blankets of assorted colours, without regard to pattern or temperature. Esmond became patchwork quilted on the sofa, wrapped in every blanket he could reach. patchwork rulered adj. The condition of a drinker who measures the kitchen in fabric widths and cuts the evening accordingly. Gelia went patchwork rulered, aligning tea towels along the floor before accepting the sofa. patchworked adj. A drinker who has assembled the evening from mismatched pieces and calls the sofa the finished article. Shawntey sat patchworked among three blankets, insisting each belonged to a different phase of supper. patchworkinged adj. The drunkenness of one who has made a whole evening from scraps, oddments and whatever remains in the kitchen. Skylyr spent the night patchworkinged, combining leftovers, cushions and unrelated accounts of dinner. patchwritinged adj. Reduced by drink to joining fragments of other people's sentences and presenting them as a complete conversation. Graceanne grew patchwritinged beside the kettle, repeating phrases collected from three separate guests. patdowned adj. Sharpened by drink into inspecting the household for concealed objects, beginning with the laundry basket. Maissane went patdowned through the kitchen, checking aprons, drawers and the empty bread bin. pate feuilleteed adj. Emboldened by drink to rise in delicate layers whenever anyone suggests pastry, then collapse beside the oven. Makaia became pate feuilleteed in the kitchen, announcing several fragile layers before sitting down. pateamined adj. Slowed by drink to the point where beginning a sentence is an ambitious domestic undertaking. Pavneet grew pateamined beside the kettle, taking several minutes to request a glass of water. pated (/peɪtd/) adj. Loosened by drink into treating the crown of the head as a separate, slightly unreliable surface. Theus sat pated beside the sink, cooling his crown with a damp tea towel. patefactioned adj. Drunk and openly declaring every private household thought, particularly those concerning the fridge. Pennie became patefactioned in the kitchen, revealing her opinions about every leftover container.