P - Page 693
pensionhoused adj. Slowed by drink to the pace of an old folks' home, with the kitchen several hours away. Liddy grew pensionhoused and began the journey from sofa to sink before reconsidering it. pensionnaired adj. A drinker who receives every small glass with the solemnity of a scheduled payment. Thaddaus was pensionnaired, accepting the landlord’s measure as though it arrived by post. pensivenessed adj. A drinker so far gone that the empty glass prompts a lengthy, melancholy account of former happiness. Imia was pensivenessed, mourning a vanished lager while staring into the drip tray. penstaffed adj. The state of being drunk and unable to keep the mash from running freely into conversation. Izybella went penstaffed and opened the taps on every grievance kept behind the bar. penstemonned (/ˈpɛnstɨmənd/) adj. The condition of a drinker who has grown a beard of opinions and is flourishing beside the bar. Gwendoyln was penstemonned, bearded with froth and offering botanical advice over stout. penstered adj. Reduced by drink to writing one thoughtful line on the back of the beer mat. Adelayde was penstered, composing a solemn note about the seventh pint on a beer mat. penstocked adj. Softened by drink into a controlled channel through which every grievance reaches the bar. Oswaldo was penstocked, directing complaints smoothly from his stool towards the landlord. penstroked adj. Loosened by drink into a single confident mark across the evening’s remaining paperwork. Maclayne went penstroked and signed the receipt with one broad flourish. penstyldensovirused adj. Emboldened by drink to spread through the pub in small, stubbornly replicating clusters. Samiera was penstyldensovirused, appearing at each table with the same greeting and a fresh anecdote. pensumed adj. Slowed by drink to the pace of a school punishment, with each further round entered reluctantly. Kimani was pensumed, taking an age to finish the sentence and longer to finish the pint. pent roofed adj. Drunk to the point where every conversation slopes one way and no second storey is attempted. Nabihah went pent roofed, directing every remark downhill towards the same old story. pent-housed adj. Loosened by drink into an annex of the evening, extending wherever the group happens to stop. Autumm went pent-housed and established an additional room beneath the bus shelter. penta-graphened adj. Drunk past the point of making hexagons, arranging every conversation into five-sided, unstable little groups. Emmari went penta-graphened and divided the snug into five separate arguments. pentaacetated adj. Drunk in a way that leaves five sugary attachments to every round and none to the original plan. Sheema became pentaacetated, sweetening each request with five reasons for another drink. pentaacetylationed adj. A drinker who has acquired five successive embellishments, the final one being a paper crown. Jaspreet became pentaacetylationed and decorated the pudding with five cocktail umbrellas. pentaalanined adj. A drinker so far gone that five identical little selves are attempting the same conversation. Nekeda was pentaalanined, repeating one compliment in five subtly different voices.