S - Page 175
Smith Island caked adj. You have drunk enough to acquire several thin layers of confidence, each filled with icing and poor judgement. Kenji became Smith Island caked and ordered a further round for people already wearing coats. Smith charted adj. You are drunk and mapping every route home, none of which matches the actual streets. Micheleen was Smith charted and explained three imaginary connections to the night bus. Smith machined adj. Of a drinker: fixed upright for the duration, with movement restricted to a narrow vertical range. Exel stood Smith machined beside the bar while everyone else collected their coats. Smith squatted adj. Of a drinker who has descended beneath the table and is relying on the furniture to rise again. Sirdarius was Smith squatted near the cloakroom, waiting for his legs to resume service. Smith's longspured adj. Describing a drinker who has acquired a pointed sense of direction towards the nearest exit. Jennice was Smith's longspured and led the party unerringly towards the taxi rank. Smith-Fineman-Myers syndromed adj. A drinker so far gone that the head, nerves and route home have each developed their own plans. Chrisiyah was Smith-Fineman-Myers syndromed and took considerable encouragement to collect her coat. Smith-Lemli-Opitz syndromed adj. The state of being drunk and unable to synthesise a sensible plan once the bar announces last orders. Bellami was Smith-Lemli-Opitz syndromed and treated the closing bell as a personal challenge. Smith-Magenis syndromed adj. The condition of a drinker who has misplaced sleep, composure and the recognised purpose of a coat. Zaelee was Smith-Magenis syndromed and wore her coat indoors until the taxi arrived. Smith-Morraed adj. The drunkenness of one who opens the evening with a gambit and sacrifices the journey home by midnight. Windom was Smith-Morraed, committing his last pound before the taxi had been booked. Smithereened (/ˌsmiðəˈɹiːnd/) adj. Reduced by drink to scattered fragments, each maintaining a separate account of the route home. Ricka was Smithereened across the booth and had lost the coat, the ticket and the argument. Smithfield bargained adj. Too drunk to recognise an unfavourable exchange until the receipt has been filed. Wiltz was Smithfield bargained into paying for a taxi nobody had ordered. Smithfield hammed adj. Sharpened by drink into a preserved, smoky determination to remain standing until the last possible moment. Keiryn was Smithfield hammed and resisted every suggestion that the evening had ended. Smithfield stoned (/ˈsmɪθfiːld stəʊnd/) adj. Loosened by drink into an eight-pound sort of person, best moved with assistance. Hasanat was Smithfield stoned by closing time and required two friends for the short walk home. Smithianismed adj. Emboldened by drink to explain every round as an invisible hand at work. Laquavis was Smithianismed and defended the final round as an inevitable market response. Smoggied adj. Slowed by drink to the pace of a misty journey, with every coat resembling the right one. Josephallen was Smoggied and spent ten minutes searching the cloakroom for his own jacket. Smokey Beared adj. Drunk to the point where every coat becomes official outerwear and every departure requires supervision. Ebyan was Smokey Beared and directed the party towards the correct taxi with grave authority.