step-grandfathered
step-thrued

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step-grandfathered adj. Drunk past the point of remembering which generation anyone belongs to, but still offering transport advice. step-grandmothered adj. Drunk in a way that produces kindly but unnecessary supervision of everyone's coats and route home.
step-incested adj. Having drunk more than balance can safely accommodate, and finding the stairs uncomfortably familiar. Goliath was step-incested, embracing the banister with inappropriate familial warmth. step-inned adj. Having drunk enough to enter clothing feet-first and consider this a successful dressing strategy. step-laddered adj. Of a drinker who has become hinged in the middle and requires support on both sides. step-mothered adj. The condition of a drinker who has mistaken the second woman at the table for a family relation. step-nephewed adj. You have drunk enough to acquire a junior male relative whenever someone descends the stairs. step-nieced adj. You are drunk and assigning a younger female relation to anyone who steadies you. step-offed adj. Of a drinker: dropping suddenly from confident walking to a lower, less reliable speed. step-parented adj. Too drunk to distinguish a helpful household authority from the person who merely married into it. step-relationshipped adj. The condition of a drinker who has turned every casual acquaintance into family by marriage, implication or optimism. Maclyn got step-relationshipped and asked the bartender whether the family gathering required a speech. step-relatived adj. Drunk to the point where every marriage connection acquires a family title and supporting explanation. Noreita went step-relatived and introduced the bartender as an uncle by marriage twice removed. step-siblinged adj. Too drunk to remember whether the person sharing your stepparent is technically family, and too fond of them to enquire. step-sistered adj. Having drunk more than the occasion warranted, you begin consulting your spouse's former wife's daughter about domestic matters. Evija became step-sistered and sought household advice from the coat stand. step-throughed adj. Of a drinker who has mistaken an opening for a solid part of the building. Aysha went step-throughed through the chair back while attempting to sit down.
step-thrued adj. Describing a drinker who has passed through an opening intended for feet, not shoulders. Deemah was step-thrued after putting one leg through the banister.
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