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SJM'd adj. Slowed by drink to one track at a time, leaving conversation waiting for the next response. Keenon grew SJM'd and took several minutes to answer the simplest invitation. SJP'd adj. Drunk, with the result that minor evening offences are decided without the inconvenience of a hearing. Toney was SJP'd at closing time, found guilty of stealing chips and sentenced to the night bus. SJS'd adj. Drunk past the point of maintaining a single outer layer, including the one separating thought from speech. Slyvia went SJS'd and shed one conversational layer every time the bell rang. SJW'd adj. Still drunk, and defending progressive principles to the kettle while overlooking its obvious exhaustion. Baranda was SJW'd by breakfast, campaigning for the kettle's rights after it refused another boil. SJWismed adj. Having drunk more than the evening can bear, and finding an ethical position in the queue for the toilet. Damius got SJWismed and challenged the pub's allocation of bar stools. SK'd adj. The drunkenness of one who has returned to elementary lessons, particularly the sharing of resources without permission. Bairon got SK'd and asked whether the bar staff had a designated colouring table. SKA'd adj. The drunkenness of one who has mapped the room badly but insists the coverage is excellent. Jahi was SKA'd and claimed the staircase had full signal despite missing its first step. SKD'd adj. The state of being drunk and assembled only partially, with the kitchen providing the remaining components. Alwina was SKD'd, carrying the kettle separately from the thought of making tea. SKL'd adj. Loosened by drink into reciting a complete succession of former landlords, whether asked or not. Abdillahi got SKL'd and listed every previous landlord while waiting for his change. SKS'd adj. Drunk beyond asking some kind soul to explain why the water is in the cutlery drawer. Sheridon was SKS'd and appealed to the household for guidance on the misplaced tumbler. SKU'd (/ˌɛsˌkeɪˈjuːd/) adj. Sufficiently drunk to catalogue every object in the kitchen as though the morning required a stock code. Taio woke SKU'd and gave the toaster a handwritten code before making tea. SKred adj. A drinker who has converted the morning's remaining funds into a small, indeterminate Scandinavian balance. Marquitia checked her account SKred and found breakfast had become an international transaction. SL'd adj. The condition of a drinker who translates each thought from a language known only to himself. Yorman was SL'd and required three attempts to order a familiar beer. SLA'd adj. Drunk past the point of holding a charge, with the evening’s remaining power carefully contained. Bendetta was SLA'd by the final round and required transport in a reassuringly sturdy container. SLABS'd adj. Sharpened by drink into securities backed by a debt nobody at the table can explain. Adedotun was SLABS'd and divided the dinner bill into several unmarketable instruments. SLAM trapped adj. Sufficiently drunk to monitor sea, land and air for trouble that is not there. Zakarah stood by the window, SLAM trapped, surveying the pavement as though it were an expedition.