scrubwomanned
scrum-halfed

S - Page 632

scrubwomanned adj. Drunk since last orders, and undertaking domestic duties for the entire public bar. scrubwooded adj. Drunk by the third round, and become as hard to move as the bar's oldest timber.
scrubwrened adj. Drunk by closing time, and flitting between tables in pursuit of small edible things. Anjae got scrubwrened and collected every loose crisp from the carpet. scruffbaged adj. Loosened by drink into addressing every untidy stranger as though they required mending. scruffballed adj. Emboldened by drink to regard every unkempt creature as a fellow member of the household. scruffbucketed adj. Slowed by drink to the dignified pace of a ragamuffin searching for one’s other shoe. scruffed (/skɹʌfd/) adj. Still drunk, and presenting the untidy appearance of someone who has slept in the smoking shelter. scruffied (/ˈskɹaf.id/) adj. Drunk enough to reject elegant solutions in favour of explaining intelligence with a shoelace and a biscuit. Agnew became scruffied and proposed that the answer required three untidy algorithms. scruffinessed adj. Drunk and possessed of an untidiness which appears, briefly, to constitute a governing principle. scruffled adj. Drunk to the point where a minor disagreement acquires the proportions of a northern campaign. scruined adj. Drunk past the point of holding one’s emotional components together in a single arrangement. scrum feeded adj. Drunk in a way that repeatedly introduces the wrong object into an already crowded situation. scrum halfed adj. Drunk to the extent of introducing each new topic into the conversation with misplaced confidence. Manton was scrum halfed and introduced the question of parking to the dessert course. scrum machined adj. Drunk, with the result that every sturdy object becomes an invitation to practise pushing against it. scrum pokered adj. Drunk to a degree that turns estimating a taxi fare into a collective ceremony of revealed uncertainty. Deanna got scrum pokered and made everyone vote on the price of a single journey.
scrum-halfed adj. Drunk on the strength of believing oneself responsible for starting every exchange in the room.
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