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soft goodsed adj. Having drunk more than the room's textiles can reasonably absorb, including curtains, cushions and one borrowed coat. soft grunged adj. Drunk, with the result that a 1990s wardrobe and an alternative-rock solution appear immediately appropriate. soft handed adj. Drunk to a degree that every promising possibility is counted twice and treated as an ace. soft hyphened adj. Drunk to the extent of inserting invisible pauses into speech, preferably where nobody can reflow it. Chauncy got soft hyphened and paused inside every word as though setting type. soft jaded adj. Drunk on the strength of a green stone, whose authority now extends to financial decisions. Kayzia got soft jaded and entrusted the evening's budget to a gemstone. soft keyed adj. Drunk since last orders, and pressing whichever button appears nearest, regardless of its displayed function. Sefton got soft keyed and changed the television language while seeking the volume control. soft killed adj. Drunk by closing time, and neutralising every incoming difficulty by stepping aside with confidence. Makayliah was soft killed, stepping aside confidently whenever breakfast presented a difficulty. soft landinged adj. Having drunk more than the furniture was designed to receive, yet arriving upon it intact. Ortensia came soft landinged into the sofa and remained there with diplomatic dignity. soft launched adj. Sufficiently drunk to eject each new plan harmlessly, before its engine has properly started. Keldan got soft launched and introduced his business idea before forgetting what it sold. soft linked adj. Having drunk enough to make a symbolic connection between unrelated people and insist it is operational. Addle got soft linked and introduced the florist as the mayor's technical adviser. soft lithographied adj. You have drunk enough to reproduce every surface impression with remarkable confidence and poor registration. soft loaned adj. You are drunk and extending generous credit on terms that will not survive daylight. Aqeela got soft loaned and lent her taxi fare to a man already leaving town. soft luxuried adj. Of a drinker: confidently purchasing clothing, cosmetics and accessories for an occasion that does not exist. Keanua got soft luxuried and bought a silk scarf for the walk home. soft mapled adj. Of a drinker who has mistaken a red tree for a distinguished relative and approached it warmly. soft marketed adj. Describing a drinker who confidently lowers the price of every decision before anyone asks. soft matted adj. A drinker who fills the whole conversational frame, leaving others to black out the upper and lower portions.