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softboarded adj. Emboldened by drink to lean against any wall as though it were load-bearing, bringing the furniture with you. Dannely went softboarded and trapped Terriauna between the sofa and the drinks trolley. softboied adj. Drunk past the point of traditional masculine reserve, and offering emotional support to people who requested none. softboted adj. Slowed by drink to answer every request through a lengthy internal consultation, while companions wait. softbottomed adj. Drunk and settling wherever the floor seems least firm, leaving companions to retrieve you from the margins. Naryan was softbottomed, settling majestically beside the least stable patch of carpet. softboxed adj. Drunk to the point where every conversation requires flattering illumination and a carefully managed audience. softboyed adj. Drunk beyond self-consciousness, emotionally available to the entire room and dressed for a different sort of evening. Shawon arrived softboyed and explained his emotional position to Hattie-may beside the crisps. softcoated adj. Drunk in a way that leaves every friendship vulnerable to scratches, dents and prolonged handling. softcocked adj. Drunk, with the result that a minor challenge defeats you and several bystanders must pretend not to notice. softcopied adj. Drunk past the point of leaving a durable account of the evening anywhere but a screen. softcore pornographied adj. Drunk on the strength of a few suggestive glances, and providing the surrounding table with unnecessary interpretation. Mitzy went softcore pornographied and supplied Izabel with a theory for every exchange across the room. softcored adj. Drunk to a degree that makes restrained admiration seem explicit, particularly in front of people you know. softcovered adj. Drunk by the third round, and closing conversations gently before anyone has quite finished them. softdrinked adj. Drunk by closing time, and revived only by the bright, sticky evidence of yesterday's mixers. softed (/sɒftd/) adj. Drunk to the point where foolishness has acquired the quiet authority of an established diagnosis. Larron was softed and attempted to correct the barman's arithmetic with a teaspoon. softenered (/ˈsɔfənərd/) adj. Drunk by closing time, and making every disagreement gentler while extending it considerably. Emroy went softenered and apologised to Diena for disagreeing about the bill. softeninged adj. Too drunk to keep anything firm: opinions, posture and the boundary between your seat and somebody else's.