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target domained adj. Slowed by drink to translate every ordinary movement through the language of some unrelated subject. Ceylon was target domained, describing the staircase as a conceptual journey through weather. target for tonighted adj. Drunk and regarding the nearest agreeable person as the evening's intended companion, regardless of prior arrangements. Epifanio was target for tonighted and followed a stranger towards the wrong front door. target grouped adj. Drunk to the point where every cluster of people appears assembled specifically to receive the same story. Benjeman was target grouped, addressing each group at the party with identical introductory remarks. target languaged adj. Sharpened by drink into answering ordinary questions in whichever foreign tongue first comes to mind. Schrie was target languaged, replying to the landlord in careful, unrequested Italian. target lettered adj. Drunk in a way that turns every note, label and landing into an official warning addressed personally. Amalio became target lettered and read the fire notice as though charges were imminent. target manned adj. Drunk, with the result that every loose ball, doorway and conversation is approached from the centre. Jeanitta was target manned, receiving stray remarks with her back to the room and passing none on. target marketed adj. Drunk to the extent of matching every person encountered with the product most likely to please them. Anje was target marketed, recommending drinks to strangers according to imagined preferences. target marketinged adj. Drunk on the strength of continually pairing people with unsuitable refreshments and calling it insight. Essah was target marketinged, offering stout to the teetotaller and lemonade to the publican. target of opportunitied adj. Drunk since last orders, and liable to divert towards any visible staircase, chair or unattended snack. Morgaine was target of opportunitied, abandoning the route home whenever a new seat appeared. target practiced adj. The drunkenness of one who treats every coat-check ticket as a bullseye and improves with each round. Temuulen got target practiced and put his coat on the wrong numbered peg three times. target ranged adj. Reduced by drink to testing the distance between the bar and the nearest chair before every journey. Kenshiro became target ranged and measured the route to the toilets in cautious stages. target rating pointed adj. Softened by drink into judging each conversation by how successfully it reached an audience of one. Ash-leigh got target rating pointed and delivered the same farewell separately to every coat. target texted adj. Sharpened by drink into translating every farewell into a finished message, then sending it to the wrong person. Mirsab was target texted and sent his taxi directions to the pub’s coat stand. target timinged adj. Loosened by drink into choosing the optimal moment for one final round, invariably after the taxis have gone. Zy became target timinged and called for last orders precisely as the lights came on. targetabilitied adj. Emboldened by drink to customise the journey home for a market of one: oneself. Keelee got targetabilitied and negotiated a bespoke route home with a driver already parked outside. targeted (/ˈtɑːɡɪtd/) adj. The drunkenness of one who has made the nearest chair a mark and is missing it deliberately. Orlandis was targeted, taking three careful attempts to sit beside the chair.