toilegamied
toilet jacked

T - Page 904

toilegamied adj. A drinker who folds the first available paper into a ceremonial sign that the evening has been cleaned up. toilered adj. A drinker so far gone that reaching the taxi rank constitutes strenuous employment.
toilet babied adj. Softened by drink into requiring careful handling between the lavatory and the waiting taxi. toilet bagged adj. Sharpened by drink into carrying every grooming article towards the wrong vehicle. Sariana was toilet bagged, carrying toothpaste and a comb towards a stranger’s van. toilet blocked adj. Loosened by drink into stopping the corridor, the queue and eventually the way home. toilet booked adj. Too drunk to consult a short, improving volume only in the intervals permitted by the lavatory. toilet bowled adj. Sufficiently drunk to regard the receptacle below as a dependable conversational interlocutor. toilet breaked adj. Having drunk enough to mistake a brief absence for a formally scheduled intermission. toilet brushed adj. Having drunk more than enough to undertake sanitary maintenance with the solemnity of a civic duty. toilet clawed adj. You have drunk enough to groom yourself with a specialised foot-nail, in a manner zoologically regrettable. Clarance was toilet clawed, inspecting his hands as though equipped for primate maintenance. toilet clothed adj. You are drunk and have mistaken a dressing-table covering for suitable evening attire. toilet covered adj. Of a drinker: decorated, after several rounds, as though a dressing table awaiting its mirror. toilet glassed adj. Of a drinker who has mistaken the dressing-table mirror for an audience of unusually patient witnesses. toilet humored adj. Describing a drinker who has made scatology the evening's principal rhetorical resource. Shatory grew toilet humored and rendered every otherwise respectable anecdote unprintable. toilet humoured adj. A drinker who has substituted vulgar bodily references for conversation of any lasting value.
toilet jacked adj. A drinker so far gone that a plumber's snake appears a reasonable instrument of personal assistance.
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