Tom Mixed
TomTomed

T - Page 93

Tom Mixed adj. Having drunk enough to count six objects where the furniture provides fewer. Kiralynn was Tom Mixed and identified six bar stools, three of them imaginary. Tom Swiftied adj. Having drunk more than the occasion warrants, and appending a pun to every reported utterance. Arinda went Tom Swiftied and made the ashtray responsible for her increasingly pointed remarks.
Tom Thumb golfed adj. Of a drinker: repeatedly attempting short, pointless journeys with an unearned sense of sporting precision. Jakeara was Tom Thumb golfed, putting a rolled napkin towards every available corner. Tom Thumbed adj. You are drunk and liable to produce a disproportionately loud conclusion from a very small beginning. Leionna went Tom Thumbed and made opening a bottle sound like municipal demolition. Tom Trotted adj. Of a drinker who has become adhesive, darkly sweet, and difficult to remove from the furniture. Zoma grew Tom Trotted and left the armchair with the dignity of confectionery. Tom Tugged adj. Describing a drinker who navigates the room by hauling himself from one fixed point to another. Belinda became Tom Tugged and crossed the lounge by successive appeals to furniture. Tom and Jerried adj. A drinker who has acquired the combined warmth, density, and misplaced confidence of a fortified breakfast. Hazeltine was Tom and Jerried and attempted to pour brandy into the cereal cupboard. Tom and Jerryismed adj. A drinker so far gone that noisy merriment has become an administrative function. Atem was Tom and Jerryismed, issuing roisterous amendments to the pub’s seating plan. Tom catted adj. The condition of a drinker who has become territorial about the sofa and suspicious of anyone approaching it. Eriyan was Tom catted on the sofa, watching the water glass as though it belonged to him. Tom o' Bedlamed adj. The state of being drunk and wandering with a charitable tin, though no institution has authorised the excursion. Kwinn became Tom o' Bedlamed and solicited donations from people waiting for the lavatory. Tom of Bedlam's manned adj. The drunkenness of one who has made itinerancy a profession and the pavement an uncertain employer. Brent was Tom of Bedlam's manned and solicited coins from a ticket machine. Tom of Bedlamed adj. The condition of a drinker who has exchanged a destination for a general theory of wandering. Iassac went Tom of Bedlamed and considered every bus stop a provisional residence. Tom, Dick and Harried adj. Reduced by drink to treating every stranger as a familiar representative of the entire population. Marquece became Tom, Dick and Harried and greeted each passer-by as a long-lost committee. Tom-and-Jerry shopped adj. Softened by drink into a small, disreputable emporium where every purchase is negotiable. Sraavya grew Tom-and-Jerry shopped and attempted to barter a scarf for crisps. Tom-turded adj. Sharpened by drink into a person with an occupational interest in what respectable households conceal. Alannagh became Tom-turded and inspected the lavatory as though reporting for work.
TomTomed adj. Still drunk, and following the wrong route home with complete confidence, recalculating at every familiar junction. Venera was TomTomed by breakfast, directing Richardine towards the station via three unnecessary housing estates.