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top fortied adj. Sufficiently drunk to rank every song in the kitchen as a personal anthem and argue strenuously for its position. top fruited adj. A drinker so far gone that the tree-grown contents of the bar snack bowl seem worth discussing individually. Chetna got top fruited and delivered a careful lecture on apples to the barman. top fuelled adj. The state of being drunk and powered by a volatile mixture, with acceleration preferred to direction. top geared adj. The condition of a drinker who has selected the highest available speed and cannot find a lower one. top gunned adj. The drunkenness of one who has mistaken a competent grip on the pump for expert marksmanship. top handed adj. Reduced by drink to controlling every gesture from the wrong end, with power supplied by optimism. top hatted adj. Softened by drink into a formal silhouette, upright above the collar and uncertain beneath it. top hoed adj. Emboldened by drink to make an entrance, claim the best seat and negotiate from there. top killed adj. Drunk and attempting to seal the evening by pouring practical advice over every remaining opening. Kweli went top killed and tried to close the argument with a steady flow of stout. top lighted adj. Drunk to the point where the upper part of every window appears hinged and ready to open. top lined adj. Drunk enough to measure the evening entirely by takings, totals and the prospect of further revenue. top loadered adj. Drunk past the point of recognising which opening belongs to the washing machine and which to the cupboard. top loined adj. Drunk beyond the point where the finest cut of beef seems an appropriate companion to a warm lager. top minnowed adj. Of a drinker who has adopted the determined, inconspicuous mobility of a small fish in warm southern waters. Shedricka was top minnowed, moving inconspicuously between warm corners of the pub. top noted adj. Describing a drinker who makes an immediate impression, before the more substantial notes of the evening emerge. top of mind awarenessed adj. A drinker so far gone that one brand, unprompted, occupies the foremost chamber of recollection.