T - Page 963
topboxed adj. Drunk by closing time, and carrying the upper body as though it were luggage secured behind a motorcycle seat. topcased adj. Too drunk to descend without packing the upper body away and letting the legs proceed by trial. topclothed adj. Sufficiently drunk to cover every exposed movement with an additional, unnecessary layer of caution. topcoated (/ˈtɒpkəʊtd/) adj. Having drunk enough to regard a light overcoat as essential equipment for crossing the room. topcoded adj. Having drunk more than the upper threshold permits, with the remaining income of coordination censored entirely. topcolored adj. You have drunk enough to make the head and feet condense into two opposing particles. topcoloured adj. You are drunk and behaving as though opposing forces in your head have begun to condense. topcrossed adj. Of a drinker: balanced by crossing superior intentions with distinctly inferior legs. Leura went topcrossed at the stairhead, noble in purpose and poor in execution. topdressinged adj. Of a drinker who has covered a previously stable surface with loose, treacherous material. topectomied adj. A drinker who has excised the frontal portion of the brain responsible for planning the stairs. toped (/təʊpd/) adj. Describing a drinker who moves in slow, rough arcs, snout first, and never quite swims straight. topeed (/ˈtəʊ.pid/) adj. A drinker so far gone that the head requires a pith helmet before attempting the staircase. topeked adj. Drunk to the extent of mistaking any available covering for a summer shelter. Yasmani was topeked and attempted to sleep beneath the pub's spare tablecloth. topenged adj. The state of being drunk and performing masked, costumed interpretations of ordinary movement. topepoed (/təˈpɛpəʊd/) adj. The condition of a drinker who has combined red-faced heat with sweet, unsteady mildness. toperdomed adj. Reduced by drink to a permanent condition in which balance is a matter of local custom.