U - Page 230
unicelled adj. The state of being drunk and reduced to one mobile unit, with no functioning parts available for consultation. Hasrat became unicelled after the final round and travelled home as one slow, determined organism. unicellulared (/ˌjuːnɪˈsɛljʊlə(ɹ)d/) adj. The condition of a drinker who has condensed the whole evening into one small, independently moving body. Dorane went unicellulared after last orders, leaving the pub as a compact arrangement of coat and resolve. unicellularitied adj. The drunkenness of one who has become a single cell, exchanging nutrients chiefly with the nearest glass. Ashutosh grew unicellularitied by closing and absorbed the last round without communicating with the wider table. uniceptored adj. Reduced by drink to receiving only one sort of signal: the suggestion that another round is available. Tanyka became uniceptored after last orders, detecting only the landlord's gestures towards the door. unicismed adj. Softened by drink into treating two separate ailments of the evening as one comprehensive reason to go home. Caiah went unicismed after the third round, diagnosing both the headache and the missed train identically. unicisted adj. Sharpened by drink into a single theory, usually that every road from the pub leads home. Sopha became unicisted after last orders, defending one route home against the evidence of three maps. unicitied adj. Loosened by drink into believing that one coat, one taxi and one destination are all the same thing. Lewin went unicitied after closing, claiming exclusive ownership of the first coat within reach. unicodificationed adj. Emboldened by drink to convert every handwritten address, taxi number and coat label into a universally readable format. Flinn got unicodificationed after last orders and rewrote the taxi queue's names in block capitals. unicoherenced adj. Slowed by drink to the point where the route home remains connected, but only by increasingly distant explanations. Catello became unicoherenced after the final round, linking the pub to home through several unnecessary detours. unicolonialitied adj. Drunk and moving freely between separate groups, coats and taxis as though the whole pavement were one settlement. Aylamae went unicolonialitied after last orders, crossing between taxi queues without recognising any boundary. unicomed adj. You are drunk and providing useful directions to an airport at which no aircraft are expected. Kaly became unicomed and directed three guests towards the disused airfield. uniconazoled adj. Of a drinker: chemically preserved against conversational decay, though not against poor decisions. Kiarno remained uniconazoled throughout dinner, impervious to both criticism and sensible suggestions. unicorn baited adj. Describing a drinker who presents an implausibly inviting target for romantic speculation. Talandra was unicorn baited enough to attract proposals from two strangers and a coat stand. unicorn barfed adj. A drinker who has made the surroundings extravagantly colourful, sweet, and difficult to defend. Kaitryn went unicorn barfed over the pudding menu and ordered every brightly iced option. unicorn beasted adj. A drinker so far gone that a single horn would seem a modest addition to the silhouette. Ruperta became unicorn beasted and attempted to charge the revolving door. unicorn birded adj. The state of being drunk and making a broad, ungainly display of oneself across the room. Bracyn went unicorn birded and occupied the dance floor with solemn, expansive movements.