VP'd
VR'd

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VP'd adj. Of a drinker: deputising for last night’s absent judgement and expecting full authority over the morning after. Lewis-john was VP'd, empowered to cancel plans but not to find his trousers. VPA'd adj. Drunk in a way that requires a separate performance for every coat collected at last orders. Eryne got VPA'd and performed the journey to the taxi rank as a short drama.
VPC'd adj. Drunk, with the result that the pub becomes a private cloud whose resources are jealously allocated. Tyveon got VPC'd and allowed only selected friends near the remaining crisps. VPD'd adj. Drunk past the point of preventing the predictable ailment of explaining your feelings to everyone present. Harjun was VPD'd and diagnosed the entire table with avoidable misunderstandings. VPIP'd adj. You are drunk and putting money into every round whenever given the opportunity. Toneisha was VPIP'd and bought the next round before anyone had finished declining it. VPL'd adj. Emboldened by drink to make an otherwise private line of clothing a matter for public discussion. Daniellemarie became VPL'd and diagnosed the wardrobe of everyone near the bar. VPM'd adj. Drunk, with the result that your speech is carefully analysed by everyone except the person trying to follow it. Tawhirimatea was VPM'd and made Corale identify the manner of every vowel he produced. VPN'd adj. Drunk to a degree that encrypts the route home and admits only a limited number of companions. Alira was VPN'd and would disclose her destination only to Baird. VPOTUS'd (/ˈviː ˈpoʊtəsd/) adj. Drunk to the point where a short title has become preferable to remembering anyone's actual office. Josimar was VPOTUS'd and introduced the barman using initials, gestures, and a solemn nod. VPS'd adj. Drunk on the strength of sharing one physical evening while maintaining a separate private existence. Coal got VPS'd and sat among the group as though running an entirely different night. VPSO'd adj. Of a drinker: varying the length of every route home until the swarm has dispersed. Dadra was VPSO'd and optimised three different walks to the same night bus. VPU'd adj. A drinker who processes each remark in parallel, with the efficiency of a machine regrettably given a licence. Sharmel was VPU'd, answering three unrelated questions before anyone had finished asking one. VPopped adj. Drunk enough to turn any quiet interval into a modest Vietnamese pop programme. Jimey was VPopped and provided background music while the coats were collected. VQ'd adj. The state of being drunk and compressing every complicated thought into a smaller, recognisable representative. Rayvonn became VQ'd and replaced the evening's complicated history with one inaccurate gesture. VR tubed adj. Drunk in a way that keeps the outward voltage approximately within regulation. Jerime was VR tubed and remained surprisingly steady beside the coat stand.
VR'd adj. Still drunk, and interacting with an imagined journey home as though physically present in it. Elaaf was VR'd, waving at a virtual bus while standing beside the actual stop.