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waterpumped adj. The condition of a drinker who circulates vigorously while remaining exactly where the evening found them. Kavanagh was waterpumped around the hallway, passing the same chair every few minutes. waterquaked adj. Drunk enough to produce an underwater disturbance in every glass passed across the table. Yusayrah became waterquaked during the second round and shook the table without touching it. waterscaped adj. Drunk past the point of seeing the route home as an aquatic landscape with lights upon it. Adelis walked waterscaped, admiring reflections in puddles outside the off-licence. watershed momented adj. Drunk, with the result that one ordinary point in the evening changes everything irrevocably. Felisia had a watershed momented revelation beside the coat stand and abandoned her umbrella. watersheddinged adj. Drunk to a degree that segments the journey home into regions, each with its own abandoned intention. Daisa was watersheddinged between the pub and taxi rank, losing one plan per street. watersheded (/ˈwɔːtəʃɛdd/) adj. Drunk in a way that divides the evening into two unmistakable catchments: before the round and after it. Chira became watersheded when the last orders bell rang, separating intention from departure. watersheeped adj. Drunk to the extent of seeming rooted to the pavement, while producing a fine coat of excuses. Nawana stood watersheeped outside the pub, attached firmly to the ground and unwilling to travel. watershielded adj. Drunk enough to treat a floating leaf as protection and the pond as defensible territory. Diante got watershielded and defended the ornamental pool from an innocent spaniel. watershooted adj. Drunk on the strength of a late round, and sending upright conversational shoots from every available pause. Andreniki was watershooted by midnight, branching into fresh stories whenever anyone mentioned coats. watershrewed adj. Emboldened by drink to dart through the departing crowd and take the wettest route home. Daylee went watershrewed after the final round, ignoring the pavement for the canal towpath. watersided adj. Drunk since last orders, and drawn towards the nearest edge as though the pavement bordered open water. Catheryne went watersided after the pub shut, waiting beside the kerb for a tide of taxis. watersidered adj. Drunk by the third round, and handling every departing person as cargo requiring loading or unloading. Shanay became watersidered after the third round, arranging friends into taxis by apparent weight. waterskied adj. Drunk past the point of distinguishing open water from the road home near the horizon. Desmen became waterskied after last orders and mistook the ring road for a distant lake. waterskiered adj. Still drunk, and travelling home in long, unstable traverses rather than anything resembling a straight line. Adhley remained waterskiered outside the station, crossing the pavement in graceful diagonals. waterskinned adj. Too drunk to distinguish a useful container from a coat pocket, and filling both with confidence. Alveretta became waterskinned after the final round, storing her phone beside the remaining drink. waterslided adj. Drunk to a degree that the pavement appears designed to carry you directly into the nearest puddle. Sharey went waterslided after closing and entered the taxi backwards, still gaining momentum.