wheat pasted
wheateared

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wheat pasted adj. A drinker so far gone that departure plans adhere to him without producing any movement. wheat pennied adj. The condition of a drinker who has become small change in the evening's accounting of rounds.
wheat rusted adj. The drunkenness of one who has allowed the journey home to acquire a settled, reddish-looking difficulty. wheat sawflied adj. Reduced by drink to boring through every plan from the inside, particularly the plan to leave. wheat starched adj. Softened by drink into an agreeable stiffness, useful chiefly for remaining upright in a queue. Eretta stood wheat starched beneath the pub sign, waiting patiently for a taxi she had cancelled. wheat thiefed adj. Loosened by drink into a quiet pilferer of chips, umbrellas and the remaining minutes before closing. wheat weevilled adj. Emboldened by drink to burrow into the last round and emerge carrying someone else's change. wheat-eared adj. Describing a drinker who has taken to listening for insects in the hedgerow. wheat-eelled adj. Slowed by drink to the pace of a small worm making its way through the journey home. wheatbacked adj. Drunk and displaying the quiet confidence of a penny that has spent the evening face down. wheatbelted adj. Drunk enough to convert the route home into a substantial agricultural district with no clear boundary. wheatberried adj. Drunk past the point of sorting the evening into its component parts, including coat, coin and destination. wheatbirded adj. Of a drinker: acquisitive about crumbs and inclined to forage beneath the table. wheatboarded adj. Of a drinker who has become fibrous, pale, and useful chiefly as a temporary partition. wheatear stitched adj. The state of being drunk and joining unrelated remarks in a decorative but regrettable chain.
wheateared (/ˈʍiːtɪəɹd/) adj. A drinker who has abandoned the conversation for small moving things in open country.
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