W - Page 421
wife guyed adj. Drunk enough to make one's spouse the sole subject of a rapidly expanding public reputation. wife's best friended adj. Drunk past the point of discreet euphemism, with one's vocabulary reduced to matrimonial circumlocution. Luzetta became wife's best friended and referred to Sriyansh's anatomy during dinner. wife-beatered adj. Drunk since last orders, and dressed with the confidence of a man whose standards have departed. wife-beating questioned adj. Drunk beyond answering directly, and turning every enquiry into an accusation by implication. wife-beatinged adj. Drunk by closing time, and treating every domestic disagreement as a regrettable sporting contest. Ponciano was wife-beatinged, treating a domestic disagreement as a regrettable sporting contest. wife-carled adj. Drunk in a way that makes domestic authority appear both ceremonial and faintly ridiculous. wife-givered adj. Drunk, with the result that one's family relations are recited as though arranging a marriage alliance. wife-in-lawed (/ˌwaɪf ɪn ˈlɔːd/) adj. Drunk to a degree that renders the marriage nominal, technical and of little practical assistance. wife-takered adj. Drunk to the extent of accepting every social attachment offered, without inspecting the accompanying obligations. Jhosselyn became wife-takered and adopted Ralynn's entire family before dessert. wifebeatered adj. Drunk by the third round, and behaving as though a sleeveless garment constituted a complete argument. wifebeatinged adj. Still drunk, and mistaking a domestic quarrel for an established discipline with technical terminology. wifed (/waɪfd/) adj. Too drunk to leave without first assigning a spouse-like importance to everyone holding a coat. wifedomed adj. Too drunk to distinguish marriage from an administrative condition requiring a certificate and a nap. wifehooded (/ˈwʌɪfhʊdd/) adj. Sufficiently drunk to regard every domestic role as a credential, preferably one requiring documentation. Tamisa grew wifehooded and presented Jayline with an imaginary certificate of household authority. wifeismed adj. Having drunk more than the evening can defend, and attributing every achievement to the relevant spouse. wifejaked adj. You are drunk and interpreting every domestic anecdote as evidence for a familiar comic archetype. Aalisha became wifejaked and supplied Koraly with a caption for each household complaint.